The coffee, the pasta, the gelato, early-morning pastries from the local bakery, the square and churches lit up during a summer-night stroll – I would love to retire to Lucca one day; I recommend anyone bound for Tuscany spend a few days (if not more!) in Lucca.

OP, thanks for your photos, they’re beautiful.

So to put this in context of fear based…I’d say it’s all about success on a societal level — of that popularity contest — to be so far lost into how society wants you to look, act, feel and say that you live their dreams not yours.

The point is that we must turn off their expectations and find our own dreams – then strive towards them, allowing no others to sway us with their needs, their dreams and their demands.

It’s actually a very interesting and empowering passage in Self Reliance, that the impulses of a man to be his best self are neither good nor evil, they just are.

I so love the prompt and the way you put it together. I love the minds this exercise will open. And I love knowing that I am not alone, that there are others and that my tribe exists.

Thank you.

Congratulations for all the successes you’ve had. It no doubt required following your heart, which in it of itself is pretty damn bold – and it’s more than can be said for many folks out there who let ‘reality’ stifle the pursuit of their passions.

And here’s not not only being bold, but staying dedicated and committed to goals along the way. Cheers!

I have thought on this for 48 hours, bounding between feelings of hatred (I hate toxic people and their effect on me), and empowerment (I do manage to remove these people from my life once recognized).

I seem to attract these people and I’d like that to stop. No longer do I want to help young women who ask for help but don’t want to help themselves – or ask for forgiveness but don’t make a change.

No longer do I want embittered women spending hours telling me what I do wrong, or how I fall short, or what I should be doing.

No longer do I want to sit near, drive with, or listen to anger, rage, disappointment, supremist, self-righteous, hatred, or judgement on others.

I just want to live in peace, harmony, and joy. I recognize that there will be sorrow, there will be pain, there will be disappointment…but I find that humankind (myself included) falls to easily to living a life focusing on those things.

I do not want that for myself and I do not want people bringing that into my realm.

There is a theory that “like attracts like” and on a very basic level this may be true. I may be antagonistic and therefore attracted my antagonistic spouse. I don’t believe it’s true though – I believe that his best side was attracted to my best side (that loving, compassionate side) and that is where we connected. Life’s adventures is what changed our primary focus.

I don’t believe that “like attracts like” is true. I believe that some very nasty people have recognized my flame and tried to extinguish it with their cruelty and negativity. That would be a judgement call and I do not want to judge another but when I objectively evaluate the things that were done to me I have no alternative but to say they “are mean spirited”, feel compassion for them (they’re missing out on some of the true beauty of life), remove them from my realm, and move on with my life.

I once wondered what I was meant to learn by having a mother that never hugged me, a step mother who steadily belittled me, a mother-in-law who sized me up to be less than she’d hoped for — and in the end I see that not one of these women taught me anything more than to recognize their ‘type’ so that I could steer clear of them quicker.

“Do That Which Is Assigned Me”

I don’t think (in this case anyway) that “which is assigned to me” is anything more than to resolve the toxic childhood. It is not to save the children from abuse, it is not to teach others how to heal themselves. No, it is more personal than that. My assignment is to put the pain away – fully and completely – so that toxic people are no longer drawn to me and so that I can get to the business of doing what I was meant to do here on earth, no matter how insignificant that may be.

I like your thoughts on “theming each day” – prevents us from just going through the motions of living a unsatisfactory life.

You also bring up an important question about setting ourselves up for the day by answering the question now. I think it’s important to set a general theme for the day and then letting the day take whatever course it needs to as you keep the theme in mind.

Thanks for sharing.